ben griffiths
an insight into the mind of a genius

Posts Tagged ‘hospital’

All your illness are belong to us

Sunday, November 23rd, 2008

Since I’ve been back from Thailand (last Thursday), I’ve been holed up in bed with an evil EVIL sicknesss.

I put off going to the hospital as long as possible, but yesterday after almost colapsing after walking down the street - it seemed it could be put off no longer, so I headed to the Ren Ai branch of the Taipei Hospital system.

I was a bit apprehensive as I don’t have any medical insurance and was worried it was going to cost a bomb, however they assured me it wouldn’t and that I’d be able to see a doctor shortly.

True to their word, only a minute or so passed until I got ushered to a doctors lounge type thing where I was asked my symptoms:

  • Severe nausea
  • Breathing difficulty
  • Fast heart rate
  • Stuffy head
  • Fever
  • Sweating all the time
  • General crap feeling

He wrote these down and from this point, we shall pick up the conversation:

Dr: Do you use a computer a lot?
Me: Yes
Dr: How often?
Me: Every day.
Dr: How many years ago did you first start to use a computer?
Me: About 20
Dr: The computer has made you sick.

Yes, you read that correctly - infact, I’ll write it again in bold and big:


Yes - I have caught a computer virus and all my sickness are indeed belong to them! The Dr said it, so it must be true….

So what next? Well I’ve been given 4 bags of medicine which I’m very doubtful about whether they will work, but hey, we’ll give them a chance - after all, you only have to read online to know how dangerous these computer virus’ can be….